The Healthy Family Connections Podcast
Episode 225 · Duration: 00:33:31
In this episode, Neil, along with his co-host Robin, responds to a widow who is left to manage her relationship with her abusive adult son on her own. Before answering her questions, Neil and Robin address the tragedy in Uvalde, TX and the trauma this brings across the US.
Pam of Boston, Massachusetts writes:
My late husband and I created a narcissistic adult son as probably from the parenting mishaps you outlined for Marianne. As a widow, I am now dealing with the dysfunctional drama in my relationship with my son which forced me to leave my home. I would still like to have a more "normal" distant relationship with him and see myself as still caring to his needs and support of him financially. He is severely depressed and when he becomes anxious with his current living situation, which is nearly total isolation from the entire family and people in society, he verbally explodes at me, repeats threats that are frightening to hear. But when on an even keel with life, he seems to be kind and normal. I know he craves validation of his thoughts, wants to be in control of everything (including me and how I conduct my life) If I resist his suggestions, I get into a fight with him. So my question is: How do I deal with him as an adult and is there any hope I can have a more normal relationship with him? Should I take his threats as serious or are they another form of manipulation?
Neil offers the mother a set of goals, including getting her son into treatment, plus a strategy and some skills for helping her be successful in this challenging situation.
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